re entry to sit ins

further to Richos advice for re entry to sit ons , i thought it may be time to tell of my re entry method for SIT INS, as its difficult to find that little hole you just fell out of when your in the water and even if you could , you would find that it too was full of water , i use the method known as Forceful Aircompressing Rearward Thruster [F.A.R.T.].The system is quite simple to use , just purchase a set of rocket launchers [ as found on all respectable 4 wheel drives], and strap these firmly to your back , have a qualified friend or wife complete all gasfitting connections and off you go for a paddle. When the BIG SPLASH comes, right the kayak to its normal position , claw and scratch your way on to the top, using the paddler beside you if necessary, do not try to find that small hole you fell out of , as its full of water now , but rather lie face down flat and brace yourself holding the sides with both hands, place the anchor in the left hand, and RELEASE the Forceful Aircompressing Rearward Thruster[F.A.R.T]. with any luck the kayak will scoot across the top of the water , and , in one instance of mine , across the beach through the trees and across the car park , this is the time to drop the anchor, whilst using the free right arm to fend off inquisitive spectators and small dogs, this saves carrying the kayak to the car , however , i does mean minimul repairs to the gelcoat and some cosmetic repairs to the scorchmarks on the rear of the kayak.